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F. E. A. R.

4 Feb

Fear–we all have it. Some of us have more. Some of us have less. But, being afraid is part of the human condition, whether we like it or not.

But, when was the last time you tried to define it? I have to admit, even in my role as a therapist, I’ve rarely asked my clients to define what “fear” means. Without a definition of the actual term, we typically spend hour upon hour trying to process “fear.” But, define it? Almost never.

So, it was with great relief that I learned a handy-dandy acronym for the word, “fear,” from an online video I was watching for some continuing education credits. I have to hand it to the speaker–he gave me a great tool to use with my clients. And, I’m here to pass it onto you.

F–False

E–Evidence

A–Appearing

R–Real

What the acronym is really saying is this: Most (not all) of our fears are based on false evidence that appears to be real. Little cute child running away from a monster

Let’s imagine you fear change, which is something a lot of people fear. Based on this acronym, what are you really afraid of? What evidence do you have that change is bad? Is that evidence real or imagined?

Either way, it FEELS real. And, that’s the biggest hurdle of all, isn’t it? We “feel” something, but can’t back it up with “real” facts. But, emotion trumps rational thought every time. So, we give into our fears.

I, for one, find this acronym an easy way to examine the fears in my own life and determine which ones are real and which are imagined. I hope you use it to do the same!

Britt

 

 

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