Friends First…Questions Later

29 May

I’ve written about this topic before: the extraordinary ability of children to “accept” others first, and ask questions later. But, this past weekend, I saw it again and just had to write about my amazement.

As some of you may know, my mother-in-law is still in skilled nursing care, unable to move anything but her face. She is getting better at talking, and that is a blessing, but it’s always difficult to see this once vibrant woman figuratively shackled to a bed. However, the three-day weekend was our chance to make the road trip to see her, and we are so glad we did.images

During our stay, my sister-in-law invited a few friends over. In this case, it was a couple who had two girls, exactly my girls’ ages, nine and eight. The anticipation of their arrival was palpable. Neither of my girls had ever met them or heard of them, but they were giddy with excitement at the idea of possible new friends for the night. And, then, they arrived.

Within three minutes, the introductions had been made, the shyness had been overcome, and I watched as my girls paired off with their new friends and left everyone behind. By the next morning (the girls had spent the night), they were exchanging addresses and declared they would be pen-pals.

As I write, I’m still shaking my head at the absolute, no questions asked, total and complete acceptance they all had for each other. I still can’t figure out why we adults can’t learn how to incorporate this “friends first, questions later” attitude. Sometimes, it seems everyone is so “filled up” with friends already that the idea of making time for more is out of the question. We can’t do it, but kids can?

I’ve always prided myself on making new friends, but even I will admit I’ve gotten lazier and lazier about it as I’ve gotten older. That stops…now.

So, here’s to all those who are accepting without judgement–at least, at first.



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