“Get”ting a Divorce Through Mediation

13 Feb

I’m a cradle Catholic, so I do know the “rules” when it comes to getting a divorce in the eyes of the Catholic Church–basically, you must get the marriage “annulled” by a Priest, or you cannot remarry in the Catholic Church.

I had no idea, however, how other religions viewed religious divorce–until I came upon an article in which discussed a divorce in the Jewish religion. It’s called a “get,” and many Orthodox Jews are refusing to give them to their wives (in the Orthodox Jewish Community, a woman cannot remarry until her husband gives her a “get.”)untitled

So, out goes the child support, spousal support, etc., resulting in many women struggling financially after civil divorce.

The article discussed the ways a mediated divorce may help circumvent the problem:

1)Keeping it out of the courtroom –and, hence, allowing the husband to maintain his dignity and pride.

2) Creative solutions–the couple can come up with ways to compromise in “exchange” for a “get.”

3)Level the playing field–if there is any power or control issues, they can be mitigated in divorce mediation

4)Avoid public shame–if the issue becomes public in some communities, the one denying the divorce may dig in his heels even more

5) Decrease double trouble–asking for a divorce is hard enough. Asking for a “get” can be even harder. So, divorce mediation can give women an alternate setting in which to ask for the “get.”

I’m so glad I stumbled upon this article–it brings up the issue of religion in divorce–and the difficulty some may encounter when trying to get a civil AND religious divorce…all good things to consider when mediating divorce!


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