To Argue or Not to Argue?

17 Jan

So, I’m in session (as a therapist, this time), and a couple/family starts to have a disagreement. The therapist in me always allows at least SOME verbal disagreement…as a matter of fact, it’s helpful to me to watch the whole process unfold. That way, I can get a sense of the dynamics of what’s going on. However, the MEDIATOR in me always wonders–if this were a mediation, how long would I let them go on?

So, here’s a question for those of you who are mediators or for those of you who have participated in a mediation–do you prefer a mediation in which verbal disagreements are allowed to come to their natural conclusion? Or, do you prefer a mediator who stops the disagreement–either by transitioning to a less-conflict-ridden subject or caucus?

I’d love to hear you out on this one–I tend to let an argument go on until I feel it’s no longer good for the parties or the mediation. But, that pesky THERAPIST in me sure would like to see how it ends!


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